Many people who are being abused do not see themselves as victims. Also, many abusers do not see themselves as being abusive. People often think of domestic violence or abuse in a physical form, such as hitting. However, domestic violence takes other forms, such as psychological, emotional, or sexual abuse. Domestic violence is about one person in a relationship using a pattern of behaviors to control the other person. It can happen to people who are married or not married, living together, separated, or dating.
If your partner repeatedly uses one or more of the following to control you, it is indicative of abuse and should not be kept a secret. This problem will only escalate in silence and further isolation will occur.
Some warning signs include:
▪ Pushing, hitting, slapping, choking, kicking, or biting
▪ Threatening you, your children, other family members or pets
▪ Threatening suicide to get you to do something
▪ Using or threatening to use a weapon against you
▪ Keeping or taking your paycheck and controlling your bank account
▪ Puts you down or makes you feel bad
▪ Forcing you to have sex or to do sexual acts you do not want or like
▪ Keeping you from seeing your friends, family or from going to work
▪ Slowly isolating you from your family and cutting off all ties
▪ Making you feel as though YOU are the problem and bringing in a lot of doubt about whether you are actually being abused.
You don’t need to suffer in silence. There are many resources and services out there. Your first step is to reach out and talk to someone.
Call Tabasom today at (604)889-3635 or e-mail tabasom@generatehope.ca for more information.
Please note that Tabasom does phone and Internet counselling sessions as well. Her Skype ID is tabasom.eblaghie
